In my neighborhood at Halloween you'll see huge inflatable ghosts in peoples' yards, almost blocking their doorway, or a yard of grave stones covered in spider webs. Trees with strange monsters crawling up the trunk. It's fun to drive by and see neighbors competing for the highest level of scariness.
Sometimes I think to myself, "you people don't even know what scary is".
I admit that since my diagnosis I carry a sense of separation from the rest of the world's holidays.
But I still enjoy Halloween. I enjoy Halloween because I like the idea of having one day to acknowledge the shadowy parts of ourselves, the parts we don't get to show the other days of the year.
On this day the pumpkin faces and the scarecrows and the witches get to come out, and it's ok not to be so polite and behaved.
That's all well and good, but we Meniere's people don't have a clever costume we can put on to show others what our darker side looks like.
A visual representation of sleepless nights of worry, of silent terrors navigating grocery stores, of white-knuckle drives home during the onset of vertigo attacks. (Hey, some of us don't have anyone to call if we get stuck on the side of the road.)
One time I had a Meniere's attack that started 20 minutes before I had to give a public presentation to a school.
What costume do you wear for that?
If there are no costumes for us, and we can't hold up a clear picture of what our shadow self looks like, maybe you and I can use Halloween as a quiet recognition and honoring of the darker parts of ourselves anyway.
Instead of judging ourselves and wishing we were lighter in attitude.
An understanding inside of us that can mingle with all of the other costumes you'll see tonight ringing your doorbell, asking for candy.
We could agree to give a quiet nod to the mainstream others who - even though they can't see our inner shadow - at least have the aptitude to celebrate the idea of having one.
I hope your Halloween is filled with connection and easy-going play.
Btw - I'm gathering 5 people who want to take their lives back from Meniere's. People who want to cultivate the skills, the forgiveness of self and society, and the determination to move forward in their healing.
Each of these 5 people will spend 12 weeks with me and come away with clear plans for navigating the emotional side of this condition. Five people creating their own life for themselves, with each other.
If you would like to be one of these 5 people, you are most welcome to book a 30-minute strategy session with me to go over the details.
Here's the link to my personal schedule if you want it:
Until then, don't let what other people do or say influence how you feel about yourself.
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