It doesn't take too long after your diagnosis to become the kind of person who always thinks and talks about illness, or the effects of illness, or what you're eating for the illness.
It gets to where it's hard to talk to people who don't understand what you're going through, because they don't understand how you feel, and you don't have the mental space to take on any extra cares because your whole mental space is taken up with Meniere's.
In fact, even when you do things like go get the mail or take the trash out or get the groceries or take the kids to school, or have dinner with your spouse, the things you notice when you look around your environment are in line with what you've been thinking about: Meniere's.
You don't notice the smell of Fall in the air; you don't notice the beauty in the world.
It's an unconscious choice: our mind only notices what is in line with our internal attitude.
People in line to pay are not just people, they're people with an evil scheme, stopping you from getting home to rest. Getting the mail isn't just a matter of walking to the mailbox; it's another duty that takes away from that small pool of attention you have to watch over and protect; and you feel fear over it.
It can get to where you walk around with a sense of dread and disconnection, and not really know where that comes from.
Don't blame Meniere's.
Blame the tendency to see the world with a filter of sickness over it - because you can do something about this today.
I encourage you to try the "what else" game. This is a game that shows you that there are many non-Meniere's aspects to life, even if you're having a bad day.
All you do is ask, after you get home from seeing family and the first line of thoughts come out from that experience: What else was said? What else did I notice?
If you are running errands and you're feeling rushed and you just want to get home, and you notice the slow person in the isle who can't make up his mind about what type of cereal to buy: go ahead and get annoyed, and then ask yourself: what else is going on?
You probably didn't see the person also waiting beside you who suddenly has interesting things to say about the Holidays, and you walk out of the grocery store the proud owner of an experience of human connection instead of apathy.
Apathy coats the world in a sad grey, but human connection brings out the warm golden sunset colors of worthwhile experience.
The beauty of living is about witnessing what unfolds. Noticing the seasons. Noticing the times in people's lives.
Sometimes we have to tell ourselves what else to notice, instead of letting our minds function on autopilot.
P.S. In the new year 5 people are going to change the dialogue in their heads in the 90 Days to Resiliency program. We're going to recreate the spark of living while we lower stress and anxiety.
If other people can do it, why not you?
Feel free to schedule a 30-minute call with me (here's the link) so we can get you in the group before the seats fill up:
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